Focus

Teleurstelling als kracht

The Power of Disappointment: 6 Steps to Turn Disappointment into Strength

Brenda Casteleyn

"Desire is the mother of disappointment." - Alexander Pola

I recently launched my third book. Although many had registered via LinkedIn, Facebook, and email, a flood of last-minute cancellations led to fewer attendees than expected. Naturally, I was initially disappointed, but the positive reactions from those present and the fact that I sold more books than there were guests made up for a lot. Have you ever experienced a similar disappointment? How did you handle it?

With these steps, you can turn your disappointment into strength.

Step 1. Acknowledge Your Feelings

It's normal to feel upset when things don't go as expected. Maybe you missed an opportunity, a promise was broken, or a goal was not achieved. That hurts. That evening after the launch, I gave myself time to feel and accept the disappointment. This is an essential step to turn disappointment into strength. In my article about 'constructief lijden(constructive suffering) I explain why it's so important to allow and give space to sadness and negative feelings.  

Step 2: Explore Your (Limiting) Beliefs

Take a moment to reconsider your expectations. Were they realistic? Could I really have expected my launch to turn into a large event that was more crowded than my previous launches? Tony Robbins, now a famous speaker in stadiums, started with events for an audience of three people. So, I had to accept that growth takes time and that it's okay to start small.

Step 3. Redefine Your Goals and Expectations

Now that you've adjusted your beliefs, you can also redefine your goals and expectations. Instead of focusing on the number of attendees, I chose to appreciate what went well: the quality of the interactions and the feedback. This helped me revise my goals and focus on what's really important: the impact of my work and sharing insights.

Step 4: Build Resilience and Perseverance

With adjusted goals and expectations, you can now continue with renewed resilience and perseverance. Like Thomas Edison, who experienced many failures before his breakthrough, I saw this experience as a valuable insight on the way to my ultimate goal.

Step 5: Create a New Strategy

You now have enough motivation to work out a new strategy. In my case, that meant focusing on the power of 'butterfly effects' or starting small. Instead of fixating on the number of readers or followers of my author's page (which, by the way, has increased tenfold in the last three months), I can now focus on a real connection with readers.

Step 6: Improve Your Self-Image

Finally, use the experience of disappointment to develop gratitude for what you have learned and pride in how you handled it. The experience has already helped me to move forward with renewed strength and confidence.

In Conclusion

Disappointment can be painful, but it is also a powerful tool for growth and development. By embracing these feelings and learning from them, you transform yourself in ways you never thought possible. Often, the seeds of future success and happiness lie at the core of disappointment.

What setbacks have you had to deal with? How did you handle them?

Meer doen in minder tijd

7 Tips to Achieve More in Less Time (Part 2)

Brenda Casteleyn

Here are seven more tips that can help you make the most of your time. Not necessarily to do more, but to spare some time for what truly matters in life.

1. Start Early or Work Later than Others

The morning hours are often the quietest and least distracting. By waking up early, you can take advantage of this peaceful time to tackle your most important tasks without interruptions. Early birds often say they have their most productive hours before the rest of the world wakes up. On the other hand, if you're more of a night owl, you can benefit from the hours when others have gone home. These hours can also be quiet, allowing for concentrated work.

2. Regular Physical Exercise

Exercise not only stimulates your body but also your mind. Whether it's a morning jog, an afternoon walk, or a short stretching break, physical activity can help refresh you and boost your concentration. Moreover, it helps to reduce stress. Combine this tip with the pomodoritechnique, or make your breaks active.

3. Eat Healthily

Nutrition plays a crucial role in your cognitive functions and energy levels. By opting for nutritious meals and snacks, you provide your body and mind with the fuel needed to function effectively. My mother knew this better than anyone. Especially during exams, she would serve the healthiest snacks. So, try to eat regular meals and avoid excessive caffeine or sugar.

4. Break Down Large Tasks into Smaller Steps

A large project can seem daunting. By breaking it into smaller, manageable tasks, you can focus on completing each step individually. This also creates a sense of accomplishment with each task completed. Combine this tip with good planning.

5. Set Clear Deadlines

Deadlines can serve as a powerful motivator. Even if there's no external deadline, setting your own can help you stay on track and be accountable for your progress.

6. Gebruik de Twee Minuten Regel

This simple rule suggests that if a task takes less than two minutes to complete, you should tackle it immediately. This prevents small tasks from piling up and eventually taking up a lot of time.

7. Surround Yourself with Motivated People

While tip 1 advises you to work when it's quiet and there aren't too many people to distract you, it's a different story when you have people around whose energy and attitude positively influence your mindset. Surrounding yourself with motivated and positive individuals can indeed draw inspiration and motivation from their enthusiasm and drive.

Do you have any other tips to increase your efficiency? Share them below.

Meer doen in minder tijd

7 tips to accomplish more in less time (part 1)

Brenda Casteleyn

"People who think that time is money usually only realize on their deathbed that their time is up but their money isn't." ― Alexander Pola

Have you ever felt like time was slipping through your fingers, even in the midst of retirement expectations or the hustle of your daily life? I vividly remember eagerly anticipating my retirement, expecting a sea of time lying ahead. Ironically, it seems that my schedule is now busier than ever before. Time is more precious than ever, and this awareness has led me to contemplate how we can do more in less time.

Fortunately, there are strategies you can apply to increase your productivity. Here are the first seven tips that can help you make the most of your time. Not necessarily to do more, but to have time left for what truly matters in life.

1. Make a plan and set priorities

It might seem contradictory when you have little time to spend a quarter-hour planning. However, without doing so, you lose a lot of time and energy hopping aimlessly from one task to another. Imagine that, through thoughtful planning, you discover that the work you do for one task is actually the key to success for another. By setting the right order, you can create synergy between tasks and handle them more efficiently. This prioritization prevents you from getting stuck in the multitude of small tasks that may not be essential and lead to a loss of time.

2. Avoid multitasking

This tip applies to both men and women. Even if you think you can do multiple things at once, it's actually an illusion. Instead of multitasking, you're constantly switching from one task to another. It's not surprising that studies have shown multitasking actually reduces your productivity. Concentrating on a single task leads to fewer mistakes and improves the quality of your work. Better focus also makes you work faster.

3. Take regular breaks or use the Pomodoro technique

Named after the tomato-shaped kitchen timer used by its creator, this Pomodoro  technique involves working intensively on a task for 25 minutes and then taking a 5-minute break. These short, focused work periods can help you avoid distractions and keep your energy level high. Taking breaks is not only a well-deserved breather, but it also allows you to stay fresh and alert, increasing your productivity throughout the day.

4. Minimize distractions

To work with focus, it's important not to be distracted. If a background radio distracts you, turn it off. But more importantly, turn off your phone and all digital distractions. Each notification requires your attention and, therefore, time. Ensure you have a quiet workspace so that you aren't disturbed, or inform others that you are working.

5. Learn to say 'No'

It's easy to get overwhelmed when trying to please everyone. By learning to set boundaries and saying 'no' to tasks or obligations that don't align with your goals or priorities, you take care of your well-being and productivity. If you've made a priority list, you can easily refer to it to frame your 'no.'

6. Use technology

There are many digital tools designed to increase your productivity. Apps like Trello help you manage projects, Todoist helps you track task lists, and Google Calendar can assist you in managing your time. Choose the tools that best suit you and integrate them into your daily routine. However, remember that technology is a tool, not a goal in itself. It's an art to find the right balance so that technology actually enhances your productivity without overwhelming you.

7. Schedule regular reflection moments

Periodic self-evaluation can help you refine your approach and identify any obstacles. So, when you're extremely busy, take some time to reflect on what works and what doesn't so that you can adjust your strategies and optimize your productivity. This prevents you from running around like a headless chicken from one task to another.

In conclusion:

These tips reveal that working faster is actually a good balance between planning and reflecting on one side and working concentrated on the other. Speed is achieved by also slowing down occasionally and taking breaks, or as the French saying goes: 'reculer pour mieux sauter,' which means 'to step back in order to jump better.' Therefore, at the end of each week or month, take the time to look back on your achievements. Consider what went well, what could be improved, and what changes you can make to make the next period even more productive. By consciously choosing where you invest your time and energy, you can have time left for the enjoyable aspects of life.

Next week, we'll bring additional tips in part 2. Meanwhile, do you have any tips for doing more in less time? Share them below...

Relaxte vrouw op kantoor die technieken gebruikt om haar gedachten te ordenen.

7 Ways to Organize Your Thoughts in an Overwhelmed World

Brenda Casteleyn

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication." - Leonardo da Vinci

Do you also sometimes feel overwhelmed by all the stimuli and endless flow of information? Fortunately, there are methods you can use to organize your thoughts and find clarity. Here are seven effective techniques to declutter your mind and regain focus.

1. Mind Mapping: A Visual Technique for Organization

Mind mapping is a visual technique where you organize information around a central idea. It resembles a tree with branches: the central theme is in the middle, and related topics branch out around it. This structure promotes a holistic view of complex topics and stimulates your creativity. Thus, it's ideal for brainstorming, seeing connections, and organizing. Want to know more? Click on this clip in youtube.  

2. Journal Writing: Reflection and Insight

Making it a daily habit to write about your concerns creates an outlet for your thoughts. It's a moment of reflection where you can express feelings, ideas, and worries without judgment. Not only does it bring peace to your mind, but it also might provide solutions or new insights.

3. Meditation: Reduce Stress and Promote Clarity

This age-old practice is effective in reducing stress and promoting mental clarity. By focusing on your breathing or a specific meditation point, you can minimize the noise from daily distractions. Just let your thoughts pass like a train, making them less disruptive.

4. Priority List: Strategy and Control

List your tasks or worries and rank them based on importance. By doing this, you can form a clear strategy on which steps to take first. Moreover, listing everything gives you the feeling of being back in control.  

5. Digital Detox: Reduce Mental Noise

Take regular breaks from technology. Disconnecting from digital devices can reduce mental noise and refocus on what really matters.

6. Nature Walks: Calming and Perspective

Nature has a calming effect on the mind. Regular walks in green surroundings can help organize your thoughts and offer new perspectives.

7. Maintain a Tidy Environment: Efficiency and Mental Peace

Clean up your physical space. A tidy desk or home can lead to a clear mind. Start small and organize one space or area at a time. This promotes efficiency, as you can quickly find what you need, and it also provides mental peace. Too much clutter and chaos in your surroundings can overload your brain with excessive stimuli. So, cleaning can improve both your physical and mental well-being.

Conclusion

Organizing thoughts is essential in the hectic world. With the right tools and techniques, you can find mental clarity amidst the chaos. It's not just about sorting information, but also about rediscovering your inner peace and focus.

Which techniques do you use to bring more peace to your mind?